Sikh Life Events: from Naming to Farewell
Every important moment in a Sikh’s life — a new baby, a first turban, taking Amrit, a wedding and a funeral — takes place in the presence of Guru Granth Sahib Ji, with Gurbani, Ardas and the Sangat. Here is what happens at each one.
At a glance
👶 Naam Karan: the Sikh naming ceremony
When a baby is born, the family goes to the Gurdwara once the mother and baby are well enough. They often bring Karah Parshad and say an Ardas of thanks.
a Hukamnama is taken from Guru Granth Sahib Ji. The first letter of that hymn becomes the first letter of the baby’s name. The family chooses a name beginning with that letter, and it is announced to the Sangat.
A boy’s name is followed by Singh and a girl’s name by Kaur. Many families also sing or read Anand Sahib, and the ceremony ends with Ardas and Karah Parshad.
👳 Dastar Bandi: the first turban
Dastar Bandi means “tying the turban”. It is a happy ceremony when a young Sikh, usually a boy, ties a full turban (Dastar) for the first time, instead of a patka. There is no fixed age; many children are somewhere between about 10 and 16.
It usually takes place at the Gurdwara or at home in front of Guru Granth Sahib Ji. An Ardas is said, and an elder, a Granthi or a respected family member ties the first turban. Some Sikh girls also choose to wear a Dastar.
The turban is a crown of honour that shows a commitment to Sikhi, equality and helping others.
⚔️ Amrit Sanchar: the Amrit ceremony
Amrit Sanchar is the Sikh initiation ceremony, first held by Guru Gobind Singh Ji on Vaisakhi in 1699. Anyone, of any background, man or woman, can take Amrit when they are ready to keep the Sikh way of life.
Five Amritdhari Sikhs act as the Panj Pyare (Five Beloved Ones). They prepare Khande di Pahul: water and sugar sweets (patashe) in an iron bowl, stirred with a double-edged sword (khanda) while they recite five Banis — Japji Sahib, Jaap Sahib, Tav-Prasad Savaiye, Chaupai Sahib and Anand Sahib.
The new Sikhs drink the Amrit, it is sprinkled on their eyes and hair, and they are told that they are now children of Guru Gobind Singh Ji and Mata Sahib Kaur Ji. Someone who has taken Amrit is called Amritdhari.
- Wear the 5 Ks
- Kesh, Kanga, Kara, Kachera and Kirpan, at all times.
- Pray every day
- Read the daily Nitnem and remember Waheguru.
- Avoid four wrong acts
- Never cut hair, no tobacco or drugs, no halal or kutha meat, and stay faithful in marriage.
- Live as the Khalsa
- Be honest, share with others, and stand up for justice and the weak.
💍 Anand Karaj: the Sikh wedding ceremony
Anand Karaj means “ceremony of bliss”. It is the Sikh wedding, and it is usually held in the morning at a Gurdwara, in front of Guru Granth Sahib Ji. Sikhs see marriage as two souls joining together on the path to God.
Before the ceremony, the two families meet at the Milni. Relatives of the same kind (fathers, uncles, brothers) greet each other, hug and often exchange garlands. Then everyone goes into the Darbar Hall.
The couple sit in front of Guru Granth Sahib Ji and agree to marry. The bride’s father places one end of a long scarf, the Palla, in the groom’s hand and the other in the bride’s hand, linking them together.
Then come the four Laavan (also spelt Lavan), hymns written by Guru Ram Das Ji. Each Lav is read aloud, then sung by the Ragis while the couple walk slowly clockwise around Guru Granth Sahib Ji, the groom leading and the bride following. After the fourth round they are married. Anand Sahib, Ardas, a Hukamnama and Karah Parshad follow.
The ceremony itself usually takes about an hour to an hour and a half, followed by Langar. In India, Sikh marriages are recognised by the Anand Marriage Act, first passed in 1909.
- What to wear as a guest
- Cover your head with a scarf or bandana, wear modest clothes that are easy to sit in on the floor, and take off your shoes.
- Simple and equal
- The Sikh Rehat Maryada says there should be no dowry, and no choosing of the day by horoscopes.
- Who can marry
- The Rehat Maryada says both partners should be Sikhs, and that caste should not matter.
🕊️ Antim Sanskar: Sikh funeral customs
Antim Sanskar means “the final ceremony”. Sikhs believe death is part of Waheguru’s will (Hukam), so the family are encouraged to accept it calmly. Loud wailing and beating the chest are discouraged; instead, people sing and listen to Gurbani for comfort.
The body is washed, dressed in clean clothes with the 5 Ks (for an Amritdhari Sikh), and is usually cremated. Kirtan Sohila is read and an Ardas is said at the cremation. The ashes are later scattered in flowing water. Sikhs do not build monuments to the dead.
At home or at the Gurdwara, the family usually holds a reading of Sukhmani Sahib or a Sehaj Path (a full reading of Guru Granth Sahib Ji at a gentle pace). This often finishes about 10 days later with a Bhog ceremony, Kirtan, Ardas and Langar, but the timing varies from family to family.
- The soul
- Sikhs believe the soul (atma) is a spark of Waheguru, and it does not die when the body dies.
- Rebirth
- Gurbani teaches that, depending on our actions and on God’s grace, the soul may be born again and again in a cycle of birth and death.
- Mukti
- The aim of human life is mukti (liberation): ending the cycle and merging with Waheguru, like a drop of water joining the ocean.
- Funeral guests
- Wear plain, simple clothes in white or muted colours, cover your head in the Gurdwara, take off your shoes and sit quietly.
❓ Questions people ask
What happens at a Sikh naming ceremony?
At a Sikh naming ceremony (Naam Karan) the family goes to the Gurdwara, a Hukamnama is read from Guru Granth Sahib Ji, and the first letter of the hymn becomes the first letter of the baby’s name. Singh is added for a boy and Kaur for a girl.
What is Dastar Bandi?
Dastar Bandi is the ceremony when a young Sikh ties a full turban for the first time, usually at the Gurdwara with an Ardas. There is no fixed age; many children are between about 10 and 16.
What is the Amrit ceremony and what does Amritdhari mean?
The Amrit ceremony (Amrit Sanchar) is the Sikh initiation, led by the Panj Pyare, who prepare Khande di Pahul. An Amritdhari Sikh is someone who has taken Amrit and promises to wear the 5 Ks, pray daily and keep the Sikh code of conduct.
What happens at a Sikh wedding ceremony, step by step?
Usually: the Milni (the two families meet), Kirtan in the Gurdwara, the couple agree to marry, the bride’s father gives the Palla, the four Laavan are read and sung as the couple walk around Guru Granth Sahib Ji, then Anand Sahib, Ardas, a Hukamnama, Karah Parshad and Langar.
What are the Laavan in an Anand Karaj?
The Laavan are four hymns by Guru Ram Das Ji. During the Anand Karaj each Lav is read and then sung while the couple walk clockwise around Guru Granth Sahib Ji. They describe the stages of the soul’s journey towards union with God.
What should I wear to a Sikh wedding as a guest?
Wear modest clothes that are comfortable for sitting on the floor, bring a scarf or bandana to cover your head, and be ready to take off your shoes in the Gurdwara. Bright colours are welcome at weddings.
What are Sikh funeral customs, and how many days do the rituals last?
The body is usually cremated, with Kirtan Sohila and Ardas. Over the following days, often about 10, the family holds a Sehaj Path or Sukhmani Sahib readings, ending in a Bhog with Kirtan and Ardas. Guests usually wear plain white or muted colours and cover their heads.
Do Sikhs believe in reincarnation? What happens after death?
Yes. Sikhs believe the soul does not die and may be born again in a cycle of birth and death, shaped by our actions and God’s grace. The aim of human life is mukti: to end the cycle by merging with Waheguru, through Naam, good deeds and the Guru’s grace.